The First Catalogue

Arrived yesterday and it did not disappoint.  There are several entries of blog-fodder in it's pages.  Today I bring you three......

This is Chippy the Chattermunk.  Press his paw, record up to 30 seconds of dialogue and Chippy will repeat what you said.  Features two voice settings: "squeaky rodent" or "deep adult".  Hours of endless Christmas morning fun for the kids turning into hours af drunken adult fun after the kids are in bed and Chippy develops Tourette's syndrome.

Retail: $19.99 (WAS $24.99)

"Fun-filled" Outhouse SHAPED Puzzle.  Not cool enough as a print, you get the fun of assembling it first before it gets jettisoned to your bathroom at the lake house.  Finally a definitive answer to "does a bear shit in the woods?".  Why does the skunk look so pissed off?

Comes in either 750 standard pieces or 300 large pieces - if you need to get this on your wall asap.

Retail: $17.99 either way

Tired of plain Hot Wheels?  Try Grannies in Wheelchairs!!  Meh, who am I kidding!?!  These are awesome!!  The description says: kit includes Grandma Sue and Grandma Betty (or rename after your own Grandmas, and place bets) track comes with "two nail biting cross over sections".  4 "AA" batteries not included.

Retail: $29.99 and worth every freaking penny!!

While I'd hate to think of anyone parting with cash for any of this stuff (Grannies excluded, my birthday is next month) if anyone wants to know where this shit high quality merch comes from fire me an email and I'll provide you with the sources.